All people know the worst part of a diet is the beginning
when you feel you are doing everything right but you still look like your ‘before’
photo. What is even worse is when you
are on a ‘lifestyle’ change rather than a diet (which quitting sugar definitely
is) as this seems to be a way of long term and sustained health, but a journey
which takes 1-2 years rather than the quick fix 20 pounds in a week styles of ‘diet.’ Once I have lost the weight though, and I am
healthy, I know I will not go back as I am making a continued and sustainable lifestyle
change … but the going is sure slow! And
since I do that ‘fat person’ thing of not weighing myself, rather going by how
my clothes ‘feel’ (I am sure this Lycra skirt was tighter last week …) I am
really struggling to feel motivated at the moment.
As Nicole Mowbry points out in her book, one of the hardest
challenges has been other people – people thinking I am crazy, rolling their
eyes, or even worse trying to sabotage.
I like it when she rebuts to people who say “life’s to short, have a
cake” with “life might be short but I would rather live it thin and with great
skin!” You are holding up a mirror to
other people’s choices by denying something in your diet, so it does make a lot
of people uncomfortable. I have found
other people’s reactions to my eating quite isolating at times – I even have
some people waiting to catch me out, almost waiting behind corners to jump out
and yell ‘ha ha that is sugar!’ My
advice would be to not tell anyone what you are doing, as this is a lifestyle
not a diet – you want wine, drink up, you want chocolate then eat it – just do
it with your eyes wide open knowing what those choices are doing to your
body. At least then when you do choose
chocolate no one can yell at you in victory that you have failed.
David Gillsepe’s book has really clouded my judgement since
reading it, and I almost wish I hadn’t now.
Firstly he lost 6 stone across 3 years, which is amazing, and clearly
his way worked for him. But he still
drank diet drinks, and ate artificial sweeteners. For me, this feels like you are still eating
sugar. As Nicole says, your body reacts
to the sweetness – even if it is an emotional reaction rather than a physical
reaction. And in fact, in my opinion,
the emotional reaction to sugar and sweetness is almost harder to move away
from than the physical reaction. He
still ate fast food, yes the sugar free stuff, but food that was not going to
benefit his body in any way. What I am
trying to do is ensure that everything I do choose to eat is giving me the best
nutritional, functioning benefit. It’s like
a negotiation; I look at my food options and think “right so if I choice to eat
you fish and chips (which has no sugar so technically fine) what are you going
to do for me? Oatcakes with salmon and
houmous, same question”. Yes, I am still
talking to my food. But while fish and
chips are ‘on program’ they are not going to add any benefit to my life and my
health. Whereas oatcakes will be slow
burning carbs, the fish is full of healthy fats and omega 3, as is the houmous,
again with filling chick peas. The fish
and chips has so much bad fat, and the chips will do nothing but stodge me
up. So it is tricky, and I have found
since reading David’s book with his chart of what to choose when you are in a
McDonalds, that I have been making bad food choices – not eating sugar, but not
being at my nutritional best.
I have been doing a new cocktail menu for my job and that
has been hard – tasting them and the milkshakes, it’s amazing how quickly I can
feel my body become addicted to sugar again.
It wasn’t long until couple of glasses of wine were added to my dinner,
and I was eating chips and crisps when I had been doing so well. I
think it is a combination of feeling like the before photo, and just being at
the beginning of something when you look for any escape route in weaker moments
– “there’s no sugar in this cheese roll, I guess I should eat it.” I do travel for work and it is really hard
living in a hotel 5 days a week to keep food exciting and nutritional but again
those are just excuses. I have eaten
well before, and last week was not a good example of how well I know I can
do.
So yeah, I am feeling a bit demotivated and definitely edgy
as I think the addition of the sugar, the carbs and the wine last week has
retoxed me somewhat. I am back to it
today, having my vitamin shakes that I make, chopping Cavolo Nero into my stew
that I made for dinner, eating avocado and cottage cheese. I am back on track because it is the right thing
to do. My energy is so much better, my skin is really
good, and my nails and hair are growing really fast which it never does. I am definitely less bloated and I feel ‘lighter’. I am going to have to bite the bullet and
just weigh myself soon so I know where I am at.
After this next detox …
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